Day 2

Its the second day of being away from him and I just have to say that last night was hard, almost as hard as watching him walk onto the plane because i layed in my bed and had nothing but the memories of us and longed for his warmth and embrace. I watched the videos I had of him recorded, to hear his voice and see his face, I looked at the pictures, and I listened to my one voice mail. I didn't dream of him either, but i did have a night scare and that really shook me up. I really hope I dream of him tonight, because sometimes when I dream of him I can almost feel his arms around me.

Waking up wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, I clung to his shirt and charlie bear, so thankful that I had those small pieces of him to hold onto. I logged onto facebook almost immediately to distract my mind but by noon i was bored and logged off. That was my first mistake, my thoughts wondered and it made the afternoon harder so I decided to watch some TV, then mom came home and I helped her make dinner. We are watching TV now and I'm just trying to keep the time passing. I really wish it was the weekend so I could go set up my room at my aunts house for school.

I sent him an e-mail and a facebook message so hopefully he will get Internet soon and I can talk to him to know that he landed safely and is getting all set up. I miss him so badly. This year will pass by quickly and then I will be able to join him for a short time in Germany... hopefully. To pass time I'm blogging and keeping track of daily pictures to show the passing of time.

The first one was a pic of my Simba (stuffed animal from childhood) and Justin's Charlie Bear (stuffed animal from childhood).

The second was a combined picture of me touching noses with charlie bear.

He posted on facebook a really sweet status update. "Walking off that terminal and on to that plane to leave her behind was one the hardest things i have ever had to do, i miss you babe" and it made me cry really hard. He doesn't normally post anything mushy like on facebook so it meant a lot to me.

I just really miss him and I want him back right now. I know that's not going to happen but I want it anyways. I'm going to save up a lot of money so maybe I can visit him during a break from school, maybe Christmas or something like that. Spring break might be better, I will have to talk about it with him and see what he says. I have no idea what his schedule will be like at his new home. But hopefully we will be able to work something out. I will have to see what his ideas are like I said, and see how the saving up of the moneys go because visiting another country is not cheap.

Anyways, that's my update for day 2, I'm done for now. I will post again tomorrow. Hope I dream of you tonight baby, I love you so much and cannot wait to hear from you. Stay safe.